Umugore na we yatangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina?

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    Marie Jeanne Mukaneza (izina twamuhimbye) utuye mu Karere ka Muhanga, avuga ko nta na rimwe aratangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina hagati ye n’umugabo we bashakanye, ubu babyaranye abana babiri.

    Mukaneza avuga ko yabyakiriye ko ari umugabo ugomba gutangiza iki gikorwa. Mu buhamya bwihariye yahaye Izubarirashe.rw, Mukaneza yavuze ko yumva gutangiza ikiganiro cyo gukora imibonano nk’umugore yumva byaba atari umuco, akavuga ko n’abagore benshi bagenzi be baganira ari ko babifata.

    “Hari ibyo umugore aba yumva bimureba n’ibyo aba yumva bitamureba. Umugore yumva ko kuba yateka ari ikintu kimureba, kuba imyenda imeshe ari ikintu kimureba ariko iyo bigeze ku bintu by’imibonano mpuzabitsina umugore yumva ko bireba umugabo akaba ari we ubitangiza.”

    Yungamo ati “Nyine kuko ari ko umuntu aba yarabimenyereye binajyana wenda n’umuco umugabo ni we ufata inzira ya mbere akajya kurambagiza umugore, n’ubundi umugore n’ibyo ngibyo bitangizwa n’umugabo, umugore arabyakira ko ari umugabo ari we ugomba gutangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano kandi mbona nta kibazo biteye.”

    Umubajije impamvu we atatangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina Mukaneza akubwira ko “akenshi usanga hari igihe biterwa n’isoni abagore baba bifitemo, cyangwa se bikanaterwa ahanini no kuba umugore avuga wenda ati ‘umugabo yagira ngo ‘iki?’ ‘Yangaya, yabifata ko ndi indaya se’, ibintu nk’ibyo.’”

    Gusa Mukaneza avuga ko hari ubwo umugore abishaka, akifuza ko haba igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina nyamara ntabibwire umugabo we, ati “abagore benshi bashiririramo bakabyihorera!”

    Ibi bishimangirwa na Safari Byuma Alphonse, umugabo w’imyaka 40, utuye mu Karere ka Nyarugenge, mu Murenge wa Rwezamenyo muri Nyakabanda uvuga ko mu rugo rwe ari we uhora utangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina.

    Agira ati “Ubundi uko mbibona muri rusange hagati y’umugabo n’umugore iyo bagiye gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina mbona y’uko abagabo ari bo bagombye kubanza kugira icyo basaba abagore babo. Nubwo n’abagore baba bafite ubwo burenganzira ubona iteka ryose bo bihagararaho ntibabivuge. Bishoboke ko ari mu muco nyarwanda, ndetse n’uw’Abanyafurika, mbona biri no muri kamere y’abagore aho bava bakagera.”

    Byuma ashimangira ko anashingira ku ngero abona ku nyamanswa.

    Agira ati “No mu nyamanswa tubona y’uko isake ari yo yirukanka iruhande rw’inkokokazi, ku ihene ruhaya niyo ihebeba, ku nka ikimasa nicyo kibanza mbese iteka ryose abagabo ni bo babanza gusaba abagore no mu nyamaswa ni uko mbona ari kamere y’umuntu Imana yashyizeho.”

    Ku bw’uyu Byuma, ufite abana 5, nta kibazo ibi byakagombye gutera mu rugo ku bantu bajijutse, akagira ati “kuba umugabo ari we utangira icyo gikorwa ntacyo bitwaye icya ngombwa ni uko bigira iherezo ryiza, kandi byumvikanyweho.”

    Undi mugabo witwa Munyaneza Théogene, w’imyaka 40, utuye mu Karere ka Kamonyi mu Murenge wa Runda mu kagari ka Ruyenzi na we avuga ko mu rugo rwe ari we utangiza iki gikorwa.

    Gusa Munyaneza we avuga ko iyo umugore we yifuza ko iki gikorwa kiba hari uburyo abimwerekamo. Agira ati “Hari ibikorwa byinshi bishobora kwereka umugabo ko umugore we hari icyo ari gushaka. Umugore ashobora kuba ashaka gukora iyo mibonano mpuzabitsina ntatinyuke kuvuga ngo akwaturire nk’umugabo akubwire ko abishaka ariko akabikoresha ibikorwa runaka, ushobora gusanga yashashe uburiri, ugasanga yatetse yateguye neza, ugasanga na we ubwe yambaye neza, yakarabye… nawe yakoze ku buryo ugera mu rugo ukabona hari igituma uri bumushake.”

    Munyaneza we asaba abagabo kumenya ko mu Rwanda ibijyanye n’ibitsina ari ikintu kidakunze kuvugwaho cyane, bikaba akarusho ku bagore ati “abagore gushaka imibonano mpuzabitsina burya si uko batavuga ahubwo bavugisha ibikorwa.”

    Badacoka Richard, umukozi w’Umuryango nyarwanda uharanira iterambere n’imibereho myiza y’abagore mu Rwanda ‘Rwanda Women Network’ asobanura ko umugabo cyo kimwe n’umugore buri wese ashobora gutangiza igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina, ko ibitari ibi ari ihohoterwa.

    Agira ati “Dushingiye ko igikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina ari igikorwa ngirana twemera ko buri wese nk’umuntu ashobora kuba yakwifuza iki gikorwa.”

    Badacoka avuga ko mu Rwanda bigaragara ko bisa nk’umuziro ko umugore aba yatinyuka ngo abwire umugabo ko yifuza icyo gikorwa agategereza ngo intambwe ya mbere ifatwe nk’umugabo, akagira ati “Dutekereza ko ibyo ngibyo na byo ubwabyo bishobora kugira ingaruka ku migendekere y’icyo gikorwa cyane ko uwagitekereje we buri gihe aza yiteguye.”

    Uyu mukozi asaba abanyarwanda ko barenga urwego rwo gufata ko igihe umugore atangije iki gikorwa ari umuziro, ko ari uburenganzira bwe yemererwa n’amategeko.

    Ese mu Rwanda umugore yemerewe gutinda mu kabari?

    Tanga igitekerezo